Taking Risks

First thoughts on taking risks

I guess it is true to say that throughout my life my itchy feet have always somehow made me take risks, some better calculated then others. Several times, with what I would consider major risks combined with strong beliefs I have been driven to the brink of complete emotional and financial exhaustion. Nevertheless, I will never regret the journeys. My adventures have turned out to be truly tuff but endlessly enriching.

So, at this stage in my life I have to think really hard what I would consider risk taking; when have I last been in any real comfort zone?

Is it simply to change the route of my daily journeys? Well, not really, I tend to do this as a matter of course just because I am easily bored and like to see what is going on beyond. 

On the other hand, some routines I find comforting as they will give me space to let my mind wonder and recover. From time to time I yearn for the more settled and easygoing security that a life without risk taking might give me.

But then, soon enough I will feel too wasteful with my time while there is so much to discover yet. So on I go and stick my neck out again, take on a new challenge or am driven to it by life’s quirky turns.

Even though in this case I am really only risking my pride and the loss of a carefully calculated bit of money (I have learned a little from my past) my latest challenge is my embarking on to this MA. How could I foolishly think I could somehow bring it all under one hat without giving up something else? But what am I prepared let go? Talking about some arrogance of self-belief…what was I thinking?

It is my work at the hospital that is my true bug bear. Unfortunately the work requires a huge investment of energy and concentration and even then I never feel comfortable with it as it challenges my ethical integrity on a daily basis. However at this time it is simply essential and somewhat surprisingly it turns out that even this job is by no means secure. In any case, all my efforts of keeping my projects going outside of this work, plus my new studies, are really in the attempt to be getting back to my passion full time and do what I think I do best.

All in all, strangely this week I feel that I am glad for every little bit of routine that I have right now.